Monday, December 29, 2014

The unexamined life is not worth living ....

The unexamined life is not worth living ....



But Socrates believed that these alternatives would rob him of the 

only thing that made life useful: Examining the world around him

 and discussing how to make the world a better place. Without his 

"examined life" there was no point in living. So he suggested that 

Athens reward him for his service to society. The result, of course, 

is that they had no alternative and were forced to vote for a 

punishment of death.

Luckily, we don't have to choose between an examined life and 

death. But the sad thing is, most people avoid leading an examined 

life. It's not that they don't have time or make time. They actively 

avoid examining their lives.

People who do examine their lives, who think about where they've 

been, how they got here, and where they're going, are much 

happier people.  

No one has all the answers. And no one's life is free from 

trouble and strife. But those who have some sense of where they 

belong in the universe also have a context for understanding how 

all the elements of their life fit together.


I've always been fascinated by Socrates' bold statement that "The unexamined life is not worth living."

He doesn't mince words. He doesn't say that the unexamined life is "less meaningful than it could be" or "one of many possible responses to human existence." He simply and clearly says it's not even worth living.

Why does he make such strong, unequivocal statement?

Socrates believed that the purpose of human life was personal and spiritual growth. We are unable to grow toward greater understanding of our true nature unless we take the time to examine and reflect upon our life. As another philosopher, Santayana, observed, "He who does not remember the past is condemned to repeat it."

Examining our life reveals patterns of behavior. Deeper contemplation yields understanding of the subconscious programming, the powerful mental software that runs our life. Unless we become aware of these patterns, much of our life is unconscious repetition.

As a psychotherapist, I see so many tragic examples of the effect of an unexamined life. I remember Melissa, a sensitive, attractive woman in her late forties who realized that a series of repetitive, doomed-from-the-beginning relationships had used up so many years of her life that it was now very unlikely that she could still manifest her dream of a husband and children of her own. I recall Donald, a caring, hard-working man who neglected his wife and family emotionally for too many years. By the time he came to see me he was divorced, depressed and living alone in an apartment.

If only Melissa and Donald had taken the time to examine and reflect upon their lives as they were living them, they could have made changes and had a different experience during their lifetime.

The good news is that it is never too late to start examining our life more thoroughly -- and to reap the rewards. Melissa never had the child she wanted but she stopped recreating her past and eventually married a loving man who helped her heal her childhood wound of a father who deserted her. It was too late for Donald to get a second chance with his wife, but he was able to build strong relationships with his children.

We all have blind spots. Sometimes when I examine a chronic problem in my life, I have that unsettling feeling that I must be missing something, but I can't quite see what it is. We try to examine ourselves, but none of us can see our own back side (our "shadow").


If there are two people, one with a map and one 

without a map, who has the better chance of 

reaching her destination? The one with the map, of 

course.

When you set aside time to examine your life,
You get to choose your destination; You get to set 

the goals;


You get to determine the path; You get to decide 

how long it will take;

You get to decide whether you're on the right pathor 

the wrong path.

In other words, you begin to know your self and to 

take control of your life. You decide who you want to 

be and begin to become the person you want to be.



Sunday, December 28, 2014


Not Giving Up & Staying Strong...

Not Giving Up & Staying Strong...

 Never give up on something that you can’t go a day without  thinking about. 

Life is a struggle. Life will through curveballs at you, it will humble you, it will attempt to break you down. And just when you think things are starting to look up, life will smack you back down with ruthless indifference.
The reason most people never achieve their dreams is because they simply give up. Life was never meant to be easy – its a constant struggle, with extreme lows and extreme highs. Remember that the times when its most important to persevere are the times that you will be most tested.
To help you in your quest to stay strong and persevere through adversity, here are some encouraging quotes about staying strong and not giving up. These are words of some of the greatest men and women who have ever walked this little blue planet we call Earth.
Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.
– Dale Carnegie
Remember that guy that gave up? Neither does no one else.
– Unknown

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.
– Albert Einstein
It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.
– Albert Einstein
When you are going through hell, keep on going. Never never never give up.
– Winston Churchill
Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires courage.



– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Don’t be discouraged. It’s often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock.
– Author Unknown
A winner is someone who gets up one more time than he is knocked down.
– Author Unknown
Don’t let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might just as well put that passing time to the best possible use.
– Earl Nightingale
You just can’t beat the person who won’t give up.
– Babe Ruth
Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.
– Samuel Beckett
Never give up on what you really want to do. The person with big dreams is more powerful than one with all the facts.
– Author Unknown
Winners never quit, and quitters never win.
– Vince Lombardi
It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.
– Confucius
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
– Confucius
Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.
– Harriet Stowe
Difficult things take a long time, impossible things a little longer.
– Author Unknown
Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.
– Thomas Edison
I am not discouraged because every wrong attempt discarded is a step forward.
– Thomas Edison
I have not failed, I have just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.
– Thomas Edison
It is never too late to be what you might have been.
– George Eliot
People are always blaming circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get ahead in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, make them.
– George Bernard Shaw
Sometimes adversity is what you need to face in order to become successful.
– Zig Ziglar
To be a champ, you have to believe in yourself when nobody else will.
– Sugar Ray Robinson
It is not wanting to win that makes you a winner; it is refusing to fail.
– Unknown
Nothing could be worse than the fear that one had given up too soon, and left one unexpended effort that might have saved the world.
– Jane Addams
The day you give up on your dreams is the day you give up on yourself.
– Author Unknown
Successful men and women keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don’t quit.
– Conrad Hilton
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
– Bill Cosby
Things don’t go wrong and break your heart so you can become bitter and give up. They happen to break you down and build you up so you can be all that you were intended to be.
– Charlie Jones
Fall seven times, stand up eight.
– Japanese Proverb
Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go.
– William Feather
The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard ya hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.
– Rocky Balboa
Don’t give up. There are too many nay-sayers out there who will try to discourage you. Don’t listen to them. The only one who can make you give up is yourself.
– Sidney Sheldon
When someone tells you that you can’t do something, perhaps you should consider that they are only telling you what they can’t do.
– Sheldon Cahoon
When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place.
― Author Unknown
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.
– Franklin D. Roosevelt
No one has the power to shatter your dreams unless you give it to them.
– Maeve Greyson
Courage doesn’t always roar, sometimes it’s the quiet voice at the end of the day whispering ‘I will try again tomorrow’
– Mary Anne Radmacher