Monday, December 29, 2014

The unexamined life is not worth living ....

The unexamined life is not worth living ....



But Socrates believed that these alternatives would rob him of the 

only thing that made life useful: Examining the world around him

 and discussing how to make the world a better place. Without his 

"examined life" there was no point in living. So he suggested that 

Athens reward him for his service to society. The result, of course, 

is that they had no alternative and were forced to vote for a 

punishment of death.

Luckily, we don't have to choose between an examined life and 

death. But the sad thing is, most people avoid leading an examined 

life. It's not that they don't have time or make time. They actively 

avoid examining their lives.

People who do examine their lives, who think about where they've 

been, how they got here, and where they're going, are much 

happier people.  

No one has all the answers. And no one's life is free from 

trouble and strife. But those who have some sense of where they 

belong in the universe also have a context for understanding how 

all the elements of their life fit together.


I've always been fascinated by Socrates' bold statement that "The unexamined life is not worth living."

He doesn't mince words. He doesn't say that the unexamined life is "less meaningful than it could be" or "one of many possible responses to human existence." He simply and clearly says it's not even worth living.

Why does he make such strong, unequivocal statement?

Socrates believed that the purpose of human life was personal and spiritual growth. We are unable to grow toward greater understanding of our true nature unless we take the time to examine and reflect upon our life. As another philosopher, Santayana, observed, "He who does not remember the past is condemned to repeat it."

Examining our life reveals patterns of behavior. Deeper contemplation yields understanding of the subconscious programming, the powerful mental software that runs our life. Unless we become aware of these patterns, much of our life is unconscious repetition.

As a psychotherapist, I see so many tragic examples of the effect of an unexamined life. I remember Melissa, a sensitive, attractive woman in her late forties who realized that a series of repetitive, doomed-from-the-beginning relationships had used up so many years of her life that it was now very unlikely that she could still manifest her dream of a husband and children of her own. I recall Donald, a caring, hard-working man who neglected his wife and family emotionally for too many years. By the time he came to see me he was divorced, depressed and living alone in an apartment.

If only Melissa and Donald had taken the time to examine and reflect upon their lives as they were living them, they could have made changes and had a different experience during their lifetime.

The good news is that it is never too late to start examining our life more thoroughly -- and to reap the rewards. Melissa never had the child she wanted but she stopped recreating her past and eventually married a loving man who helped her heal her childhood wound of a father who deserted her. It was too late for Donald to get a second chance with his wife, but he was able to build strong relationships with his children.

We all have blind spots. Sometimes when I examine a chronic problem in my life, I have that unsettling feeling that I must be missing something, but I can't quite see what it is. We try to examine ourselves, but none of us can see our own back side (our "shadow").


If there are two people, one with a map and one 

without a map, who has the better chance of 

reaching her destination? The one with the map, of 

course.

When you set aside time to examine your life,
You get to choose your destination; You get to set 

the goals;


You get to determine the path; You get to decide 

how long it will take;

You get to decide whether you're on the right pathor 

the wrong path.

In other words, you begin to know your self and to 

take control of your life. You decide who you want to 

be and begin to become the person you want to be.



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